Re-post: Finding voice

This is a re-post of the first one to appear on this blog 11 December, 2011. My apologies to those who have already seen it.

“If you hear a voice within you say ‘you cannot paint,’ then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.”   –  Vincent Van Gogh

“Never give up. And most importantly, be true to yourself. Write from your heart, in your own voice, and about what you believe in.”   –  Louise Brown

“I write for those women who do not speak, for those who do not have a voice because they were so terrified, because we are taught to respect fear more than ourselves. We’ve been taught that silence would save us, but it won’t.”  

–  Audre Lorde


Finding voice…

Be tells me to keep writing

Cait tells me to just write

My past tells me I can’t write

Fear writes for me

Anger writes the loudest, and is most prolific

Joy is silent, nearly invisible

Sadness drones on and on

Pain is sharp, isolated, and intense

Journals are scattered about my home

Tossed into the recesses of the car

They harbor numerous attempts of binge/purge

When moving I will devalue their loyalty

As I shove them through the shredder

The ghosts of childhood critique every effort

They silence me with threats to expose my failure

Deep inside the struggle

To break through the barriers

Quakes with revelatory thunder



Author: Léa

A wanderer who has found home and herself in the South of France.

16 thoughts on “Re-post: Finding voice”

  1. i think we’re all familiar with those inner voices that tell us we cannot do this or that… and i love the van gogh quote you start this with… doing exactly what they tell us we get them silenced.. i like…

  2. This is one I havent read before Lea. It rings so true regarding those insistant voices of self that tell me I am just useless, and am simply kidding myself. I am gradually breaking free from those voices but they do still hang around on the edges.

    I love the first quote! It shouted at me to get out my pastels again, which I have ben putting off. Why? Because Im useless of course!!!

    And you can most definitely write, and beautiffully too!! 😊

    Thank you for this fabulous poem which has left me thinking.


    1. Christine, it was the very first post on this blog. While I have come a long way, there are still a few voices that like so be heard. However, now when they tell me I can’t write, I write. When they tell me I can’t paint, I paint…

      I wish I could see some of your pastels! Perhaps some are inspired by your lovely garden?

      In my opinion, a poem that makes anyone think has done its job and I thank you!



  3. Its a long time since I did any pastels and now its a totally new venture as I have to do them with my left hand. I cant draw or paint for toffee, I just merge colours and see what happens! Lol

    Im pleased you write when the voices say you cant. They are liars! 😊



    1. Those voices are very specific and in the process of healing, I had realised that they too had been victims. For me, the thing is that I had to choose to be different. I knew as a very little girl that I did not want to be like them. I never wanted to hurt anyone as I had been hurt. The price was very high but I couldn’t do anything else.

      Yes, they are liars!



  4. You have had a difficult journey! And you must have done so much work to get to where you are and if it means anything, I feel privileged to know you and that you are my lovely friend! 😊


    1. Difficult? Yes. But it is all relative and it has made me who I am. The thing is now, I like who I am! 🙂 It took a long time to get there but many never do. I was one of the lucky ones! I feel honoured to know you! A mutual admiration… 🙂 I am so very grateful for all the wonderful people now in my life and feel truly fortunate. Of course, that means you are stuck with moi! 🙂


  5. I really love this write Lea, like others I can identify with it so much. Great choice of quotes too, the Louise Brown one is a favourite of mine 🙂 x

    1. Thank you Becka! It is always lovely to hear from you. There are too many women who have struggled to have a voice! As for the quotes, you do know I can hardly ever just have one… 🙂 x

      1. You’re welcome 🙂 and I know what you mean about quotes, one is never enough! x

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